阿婆the GM - paper vulture ;

i know i'm crazy
i know i'm super busy,
abnormally busy

i know and i'm sorry.

i'm sorry that i can't commit to hallplay because of science
i'm sorry that i can't commit to science because of hallplay
i'm sorry that we haven't spent more than 6 hours together in one day before
i'm sorry that other couples get to spend everyday with each other during vacation
while i can only see you once a week.

i'm sorry that i'm not superwoman,
and yes i know that i'm not superwoman.
i once thought i'd just rise up to be one anyway
well i realised i'm not
and i'm sorry.
i know how tough this is for you,
but what makes you think it's any better for me?

i'm not superwoman YES I KNOW.
i'm barely coping, in fact i'm struggling.
don't have time for everything.
because everything's clashing.

i'm sorry that i'm not superwoman
and that you had to bear this because everyone thought i was
or wanted me to be
but i'm only just starting to realise it
so give me time
give me time to settle everything
close it up.

do you even realise?
it's so hard for me to take out time
when people are doing stupid things,
like cutting allocated vacation by one week.

i want to spend every minute of the day with you more than you want me to.
everything you're asking from me,
i want more than you do.

everything's becoming a liability.
comm, hall, friends, everything.

im not coping and i know it so just shut the fuck up
and let me do things at my own pace.
i won't compromise on quality,
so don't compromise on quantity for me.

i don't wanna be superwoman anymore.
i just wanna be me.
your me.

im sorry for how all of these is turning out to be,
and im sorry for not knowing what i want.
actually, i do know.
but it just doesn't seem very me to put down everything for that.

and now i can't sleep because of what you said
though said with lovely intentions,
cut me deep.