阿婆the GM - paper vulture ;

OMG.
hahahahahahahahahahahahaa.

*burpppp.
that was cute hahahahahahahhaaha.

lmao. muttons are talking about delifrance at airport being a good mugging spot.
including what we thought about it as a library

"i don't even dare to talk when i'm there la!"
hahaha.

i am still in disbelief in how you managed to take over my life.

i'm glad it's all over.
i'm so exhausted.

can someone help me decide?
please.
i don't wanna live in uncertainty again.

here or there?
too many factors involved.
waaaay too many.

but it's my life.

jason mraz - i'm yours

well you done done me and you bet i felt it
i tried to be chill but you're so hot that i melted
i fell right through the cracks
and now i'm trying to get back

before the cool done run out
i'll be giving it my bestest
nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
i reckon it's again my turn
to win some or learn some

i won't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, i'm yours

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
a la peaceful melody
it's your god-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved

so i won't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, i'm sure
no need to complicate
our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours

i've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
and bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass so i drew a new face and laughed
i guess what i'm saying is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
it's what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

i won't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, i'm sure
no need to complicate (well open up your mind and see like me)
our time is short (open up your plans and damn you're free)
it cannot wait, i'm yours (look into your heart and you'll find love love love)

i won't hesitate no more, no more
(listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me; a la one big family)
it cannot wait, i'm sure (it's your god-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved)
no need to complicate (well open up your mind and see like me)
our time is short (open up your plans and damn, you're free)
this is our fate, i'm yours (look into your heart and you'll find love love love)

please don't complicate (listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me)
our time is short (a la happy family)
this is our fate, i'm yours (it's your god-forsaken right to be loved love loved love)

please don't hesitate no more, no more
(listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me; a la peaceful melody)
it cannot wait, i'm yours. (it's your god-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved)

----------------

will upload pictures later!
halloween was GREAT fun hur.
zzz what should i have for lunch?

-----------------

of this and that and other whatnots that i actually have to care about
i'd love to take out some time and spend it with you
but it's always fine if i can't because you're always there anyway (:

there's still a wish i wish would come true though.
maybe it'll all work out if i decide.
if i decide.

"
of smiling friends and friendly smiles
of smiley moments and friendly faces
of you and me, me and you,
me and them, them and us
doesn't seem real, doesn't seem bad
idk. (and don't force me to punch your face)

halloween :)

i'm gonna have to take a look at this constructively.

there's more (to you than that smile on your face)
and i know i'm not prepared
there's more (i don't know after every hug you give)
and i know i'm not prepared
there's more (to uni than just passing my time this way)
and i know i'm not prepared
there's more (than just midsems for passing my modules)
and i know i'm not prepared
there's more (than something between us)
and i know i'm not prepared.

there's more
and i want it all to end.

then fuck off from blogger and go study la!!!!

god's way of telling me to fuck off from facebook:



i know the image's too long
but facebook's now white and in times new roman,
so it doesn't really matter!

and by the way,
wrong move, microsoft.



don't try to make your problem MINE. :)

i'm just plain exhausted.
i don't even have the strength to fight for change anymore.
it's such a pity that other factors could be more important than the rest of my life.

money's worth more than me,
time's worth more than me,
reputation is worth more than me,
even junkies are worth more than me.

i can't help but feel down down down
if only i could go back to the old lifestyle
if only he wouldn't stop me.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

school is taking over my life
and that isn't how it's supposed to be.
(it should be the other way round)
and i'm not happy at all.

all the time i act so brave i'm shaking inside

one down,
two more to go.

just..shut up.

-----

be a fool to yourself forever more.

p.s lol facebook surfing just now. and i saw this post on the I ♥SuperPoke! group.

You know you're addicted to SuperPoke when..

-You're banned from every farm in the state for "animal cruelty"
-You've asked someone out on a date through various SuperPoke options
-You say "Bitch I'm gonna throw a sheep at you" at LEAST once a day
-You introduce yourself at parties as "the guy who gave you an Oreo"
-Having SuperPoke wars gets you through 1+ hour long lectures
-You doubt someones friendship if they SuperPoke you with a negative action
-You have more beers and sheep than any wife-beating farmer in america
-You submitted a bug report when you spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how many people you needed to poke to get to the next level, only to realize you're already at the highest level
-You missed your friends birthday so you sent them a beer
-Your friend missed your birthday so you trout slapped them
-You have at least 15 new notifications every other minute, and all of them are from SuperPoke
-People stop writing on your walls and start SuperPoking you, and you completely understand what they mean

lol.
i miss superpoking!
can you please give me more levels.
recently my action on facebook has been nothing but supporting fights
adding friends, chatting on msgs, simply POKING (super boring),
changing status, seeing other's status. so b.o.r.i.n.g

then today i discovered that boozemail has gay drinks.
like Squishee (iced milo/ slurpee) and Watermelon Titanic.
next up, i'm gonna send out some gay canned drinks.
i wanted to send Green Tea but i kept sending green tea in top friends alr.
Bottled Water, Buzz Cola, Coffee, Milk, Soda, Tea, Earl Grey, Hot, here i come!!

okay i just saw the random drink. yawns.
off i go to tech mtg!!

OH OKAY RANDOM REALLY ROCKS!

some wishes came true
too true, too soon
and left me hanging on another thread now.

me and my stupid mouth.
it wasn't that bad?
i don't know.

because it was the busy period?
zzzzzz.

november 16.
hah.
that's the period of time when i'll stop working
cos of exams.
and first two weeks of december are impossible.
so..
even though it was "two months" one month ago,
it's still "two months" now?

-------------

i wonder what made you call right after i did.
and what makes me keep talking.
you're more than a friend, more like a brother,
because of all the comfort i find in your words.

i really wonder
is this an exercise video
or a learn english video?

when are you coming back?
at the rate i'm yearning,
by the time you're back i'll be a giraffe!

i keep looking around, hoping you'll appear again
this time when i'm around.
i wish you had stopped by when i was there.
what's the point of appearing and asking about me
when the only way i can find out is by word of mouth

everytime i look around, crossing my fingers and NOT see you,
i know i'm just being stupid again
but what can i do?

so many other people care
but that's not what i want!
don't make me want something i don't

i wish i could be a little girl again
so i'll get anything i want
just by stretching my hand out.

do drop by again, all i want to do is see how you are now
from what i heard, i don't think you're fine
but i hope you are, i do hope.

try not to show that you care alright,
if you ever appear again.
because i don't want to fall the way i did before.

hey little girl on a spending spree
i don't come cheap but the kisses come free
on closer inspection i'm sure that you'll agree
hey little girl listen to my plea
i come with a lifetime guarantee
one day maybe we'll find that baby makes three
it's the ladies' choice
i'm the ladies' choice

zzzzzzzzzzz.

can't catch up..............

falling behind,

and who are you?

west is so hot.

SO HOT.

but omfg he's 26.
don't look like la!

never been this far.

----------

going home!!!

seems like everything is coming to a standstill
and all i want to do is to take things slowly,
let my life just tick past me,
and hope everything will just work out fine in the end.

i don't really have the energy for anything right now.

OUCH.

i slipped and fell and it's fucking painful :(
and the blue-black has the mark of the stairs
and it's damn big!!

let me comfort myself with mushroom soup,
online quiz 3
and the fact that i'm off till thurs fri.

starting to be burnt out.

hahaha.

out i go!

five reasons kept me going. five kept my passion alive. one left us. one transferred out. one broke my heart. one turned his back on me and the last one is serving her last two weeks' of notice. is there anything else worth staying for? all the people i fought for in the past are fighting me in return now. i guess karma really is crap. or maybe it's just them. but in these 2 months i've realised, it's more or less everyone.

typing in para format may be better because it's more mafan to read and people are more likely to get confused midsentence if i suddenly change topic and say i've got icecream on my hair two thousand bags of detergent charge handphone hohohoho i enjoy this.

i really wanna leave now. and i think i will. even if they gimme sth better. somewhere else. i dunno. it's just not where i wanna stay anymore. long talks about the old times make me think. does climbing the ladder really mean THAT much to all of you? i know you've gotta want to go up higher, but does it mean putting our friendship at stake? does it mean putting everything we've had for 8 months at stake? taking advantage of the situation don't seem too gentlemanly to me. you're in a fucked up company and too bad. you want to get your promotion when you think you're worth it, just go away. don't fucking snap and shout and interfere in our matters when on the other hand you complain about too many things to do. don't know what's going on in all of these weird weird minds. i guess adults really are a little mad. i don't wanna grow up and become like these psycho people!! and if i hear "shut up, part-timer" one more time, to me or anyone else, i swear i'll hit the roof. and i'll leave. because the place doesn't mean anything to me anymore. the parts that have meaning have been torn down and replaced with tacky chinese wallpaper anyway. i've no idea why i settled for the worst choice, when i had so many all lined up. i feel as if i've let down geoffrey because he was so sincere. not like some motherfucking fat fucker who only know how to pretend. i'll choose who i need to trust prudently from now on. in school, at work, anywhere. everyone.

btw, i am obsessed with upping my level on superpoke.

:)

i'm such a loser.

LOL.

but it's fun!! :)

----------

all these weird dreams seem to tell me something
about who he really is.

to do list

- file first half of sem stuff.
- watch heroes
- watch prison break
- do 1100 tutorial
- edit itunes playlist (for ipod)
- save my winamp playlist.

all at the same time :)

DO NOT BE DISTRACTED BY FACEBOOK! :)

midsems are finally over and i'm not that glad
i mean
glad of course, cos it's over
not glad cos there's more,
and i know i'm not prepared.

----------

update!
as you can see.
i've been pretty productive!
i've done almost everything except tutorials. hahahaha.

-----------

yawns. it's still 510 and im still awake.

i miss jc!

SMACKS MYSELF ON THE HEAD

stop whining you farty ass.

blogging from it1801 tutorial again hurhurhurhur.

----------

i want my life back.
with or without, i don't care.
just with, or just without.
just don't let me have you
then have to do without.

because of this stupid ahma
the lounge become super infested with ants
and cos she's scaring all the lizards away,
the lounge has become unstayable!!

LOL two chinese girls

NOT EMO LA.

walawala on wednesday?

guilt is crashing over my head.
cos i'm not studying,
not working hard enough,
not doing what it takes
to justify the amount of money and effort put into me
18 years of upbringing were for these 4 years,
which are for the rest of my life.
i can't believe time moves that fast.

all i need,
is a little focus.
and i'll well be on my way.

i am so fucking disappointed in you.
i'm not going to apologize this time.

in fact, i'm not going to feel anything but wronged
i am not going to be affected by the whole thing until you apologize.
and i'm not going to talk with you the way we used to talk anymore.
because you always stick with your own side of the story.
i was so angry, the blood all rushed up to my head
and i could really punch you at that moment.

and all the rest just won't let me cool down.
the more you say, the more i react, alright.
which made me discover something about myself.

i cannot take love.

and this shit from anyone.
the company, the colleagues,
the people i treat as friends.
bah.

-----------

the last time i cried at the very same spot,
you were there to hold my hand.
which made me cry even more.

opposites attract
chemicals react
when i look at you.

dazzles me the rain
fires fear the flame
can't deny what's true

i used to be one of those stupid girls
but now i'm not.
though there's always the slightest temptation.

that's how far i'd go.

i'm counting down,
slowly, excitedly,
adrenaline whenever i hear your name,
whenever i picture you doing what the others describe.
i can't wait. :)

no matter whether i get answers or not,
i just wanna see you again.

wrong step taken.

i don't feel 19 leh!
don't feel any different.

i think i need some time by myself
without anybody else
i just need to unwind
in my time machine

i need to go far away
a few years back would be okay
i just need to unwind
in my time machine

one coming up later,
one tmr,
one monday,

and half the sem is gone.

it's wayy too late to contemplate my choices.
at this point of time.

you say i can do it,
but what if i can't?

how are you supposed to blog on your birthday?
am i supposed to go about how did my birthday go
and how did i celebrate? hahahaha.

birthday ah.
skip lessons, :)
lessons, :(
skip lessons, :)
lessons end early, :)
lessons end early. :)

hahahahaha.

last night was truly enjoyable though :)
and the night before too :)

how'd i celebrate my birthday LOL.

• play like mad, study like mad.
• had a surprise party in the lounge
• saw my best friends all in the place i detest
• made my own birthday lasagna!
  
• eat tunglok for dinner!
• shopped for phone but haven't buy yet.
• took lovely photos with my brother send me send me
• cabbed to work
• had my babes come down even though they were off
  
• sold a bottle of veuve brut when the bugger ordered rose.
• went to lunar and made my presence super felt.
• had the live band cheena singers sing birthday song for me!
• talk to old friends, made new friends
• play around with us young ones, suan the old ones
  
• get drunk when lessons start at 10 the next day
• ranted about everything on the way back to madhu and romeo
• went back to hall and sleep in ahma room, ruining her favourite song.
• saw the lovely note that hallplay tech pasted on my door
  
• went to sleep super tired, super drunk, but super happy :)
  

im a crazy bitch around those people
and i feel so loved.
so so so so so so so loved.
by everyone.

feel so loved by the lovely alphabets (a, c, d) for planning the party
feel so loved by the guys of 304 for making it all the way down to celebrate with me
for every special birthday surprise they bring me every year
for every effort to make me happy
for every single smile you've put on my face
for every happy dream i've had of you
for being there for me whenever i need you.
for understanding me more than anyone could ever do.
for giving so much to me, when all i've done for you is nothing.

feel so loved by my mum, brother and sister.
for everything they're willing to give me
for their love for me with the whole of their heart.
for just being there and making me happy.
for putting my happiness at first place,
when all i've done is lie to you.

feel so loved by the people at clinic.
for everything we've been through together
seen the rise and fall of clinic,
seen management come and go,
seen politics and catfights.
seen batch after batch of staff turning over,
grown together, grown as one.
finally consolidating what was the best team ever
but eventually having to separate again.
for our brutal honesty with each other
and the friendships we've forged together.
for making my birthday night so special and so happy
for making me the star of the night even though there should have been 5.

feel so loved by all the others too
those who wished me happy birthday :)
at least you guys remembered (:
though it's really easy to remember la but never mind.

in fact, there's one group of people that disappoint me terribly.
and anyway it doesn't feel very birthday-ish at the moment..
so..
hahahaha.
thanks to everyone anyway! :)

photos of last night soon please!!

------------

how much did you ever love me
and how much will you ever do?
would you even think about me the way i think of you
could you even bring yourself to think about me?
the more i know the answers, the less i'm able to take it.

-------------

anyway since i've changed my blog add,
it's more or less private among those ppl who have the links.
try not to give the link to people who you don't think i'd like to read
hur. <3

blogging from 1801 tutorial.

what a bad start to the second half of the sem.
skipped my lab and gonna skip another lecture.

but that's just for today.
it sucks when you can't have time for yourself.

"skip lah. go shopping. birthday must go shopping one."
"tell whoever it may concern that birthday cannot be near exam can."

i'm not motivated enough just yet.
and there's tech mtg again.

once 400 hours are over,
i'll prove my worth.
i'll work harder than how i did when i was a full-timer.

i'll be patient cos this is long term.
400 hours are about 3-4 mths.
i waited tht long when i was ft and got only a 50 raise.
i'm gonna get what im worth and mark my words.

a $1 raise will make a hell lot of difference.

some people will love you till the end of their lives
and give everything to make you happy.
sometimes,
you're on the giving end.
i'm glad for true friends,
who make me feel that bastards aren't gonna dictate my life.

huat. (but i still love you so much and i can't stop.)

thank you :)

but i can't blog now.

will explain when i can :)

love you all!!